Engagement pressures… A few weeks ago I did a little youtube video about engagements. I thought I’d do a little post to carry on the conversation, or for anyone who missed the video. No matter where you are in your relationship, or not in one at all, I bet you’ve got an opinion on engagements. I certainly do! And it’s amazing how much my opinion has changed too.
I never used to think the length of time before getting engaged mattered, and I still don’t. But, I do think the amount a couple has experienced together does matter. Like, a lot. That’s just my opinion though, and (harking back to my last post) based on my own personal experience.
What Are Engagement Pressures?
Okay, so engagement pressures can be a whole number of things. Pressure from family or friends to ‘hurry up’. Which, by the way, can be felt by both the proposer and the proposee. Pressure from influences (such as social media) for the proposal to be a certain way. Or announced in a certain way. Pressure to get engaged when you might not want to… The list goes on. To be honest, everyone will have their own version or understanding of engagement pressures. And that can’t be avoided (unless you’re insanely lucky). You can find a way of dealing with them though, or even ignoring them altogether.
Why Do We Feel Them?
Simply? To satisfy others. Humans have this weird need to be liked, admired, accepted, whatever. And when we feel these pressures from other people, we’re feeling them because we want to be accepted (or whatever) by those people. Or to make those people happy. Whatever the exact reason is, the point is the same. We aren’t feeling them to gain anything for ourselves. So over a topic which really is about you, your significant other, and your feelings, why do we let ourselves succumb to pressures to satisfy the needs of others? Who knows! But we shouldn’t. You shouldn’t. Life will be easier if you don’t.
The same rule applies for your wedding, too. It’s your day, and the only thing that really matters is that you’re committing to spending the rest of your life with the person you love. I mean, that’s pretty bloomin’ special, right?! It doesn’t need to be about anything (or anyone) else. Quite often a wedding turns into a couple trying to prove something, or trying to create this ‘image’ which is more often than not completely untrue. Relax, enjoy it, and who cares what other people think?! Let. It. Go.